Fun At the Company Firing Range
by Entwife Incognito
Summary: A last quickie for Jane and Lisbon before the season six premiere! I guess my excitement became theirs ;-) Thank you to plestex716 for her suggestion of the setting! One shot! No Plot! RJ is dead! Warning! This story has strong sexual content, some of it unconventional. If you don't like that type of material, do not read this! Disclaimer: The Mentalist? Not mine.


_**A/N: This story is dedicated to plestex716, who suggested the wonderful setting for this tryst. Thank you so much. You suddenly stopped posting anywhere, and I miss you a lot. I hope all is well and we will all hear from you soon. While the internet offers so much in the pleasures of its community, its anonymity can be a terrible source of worry when one of its members just suddenly stops communicating.**_

Hellacious! That's what it was, a hellacious day. Bad wouldn't do it justice. Terrible might make it halfway there. All the effort on their new case had been a waste of time. Bertram had yelled at her, made snide remarks about Jane and the trouble he had caused with three witnesses and a suspect, all in one day, perhaps tainting, no crippling, the case for the district attorney.

Jane. Patrick Jane. It was always Patrick Jane. Teresa Lisbon knew it wasn't fair to make such a broad statement. Hell, it wasn't even true. But it felt true. He stood in her office now. What words had she not already said to him over the years to get him to conform to the standards they needed to follow in order to be able to actually prosecute the criminals they caught?

How meekly and innocently he had stood in the bullpen until she walked through, snapping her fingers at him, not breaking her stride and calling, "Jane. With me. With me. With me. Right now."

The bullpen had gone deathly silent. She opened the door and pointed inside, refusing to look at him as he passed grim-faced. She slammed the door and closed the blinds on the gaping faces that were turned to her windows.

She was fuming, banging the chair around, slamming her desk drawer as she brought a pen out. She slapped a pile of paperwork onto her desk that would have to be filled out in order to cover Jane's ass, and therefore hers, one more time. And it could happen again tomorrow. The stubborn asshole! She turned her face to him for the first time since she'd had him come in for his ass-chewing and glared wordlessly.

Jane glanced at her briefly, not wanting to meet her eyes just yet. "Want to go shoot something? We could go to the firing range and you could kill some targets."

"I don't think you should go with me there right now. A problem with my aim could end badly for you."

She obviously wasn't angry enough. He could fix that. "Oh, come on. You know it would make you feel good. Maybe you're just not pissed off enough."

"Shut up, Jane. You're making it worse."

"Meh. You know those people were idiots. I just exposed them."

"And because you have to be the smartest person in the room, your methods of exposure have probably destroyed the DA's case."

"DA. Who cares about him? This is about justice, Lisbon. We got justice this week."

"Face it, Jane. You asinine show off. You just stood there and waved your dick."

"Colorful. You should write poetry."

"You son of a bitch! We could have had them! Now they'll have us tied up with lawyers until doomsday. And they have the money to do it without thinking about it."

"That's the DA's problem. We know the truth! It's a beautiful thing, Lisbon."

"Shit! There's nothing beautiful about it! You're a child, Jane. Bertram just handed me my ass on a platter! I'm sick of taking crap for you. Not to mention all the crap I have to take FROM you."

"Awwwwww. Here's our angry little princess. So beautiful and fiery."

Lisbon lowered her voice to threat level. "Fuck you, Jane. Shut the fuck up. You little bastard. No conscience at all . . . "

What followed was a muttered tirade of invective that Jane couldn't fully decipher. A lot of it seemed to be about shoving various items up his, well, it didn't matter. He had her wound up now, ready to explode. If they were home, he would be having the fuck of his life in about ten minutes as she worked all that steam off with him. But it would be hours before they left work. Maybe he could kill two birds with one stone. Anticipating her state of mind, he'd made a phone call to clear their path . . .

"And don't think you won't pay for this, Jane. As long as I keep getting crap for it, I'll serve it right up to you . . . and shove that up your ass."

Jane did his best not to smile. She was still cursing him.

"Do you want to go shoot something, now?"

"Yes! You bastard! And don't get in my way."

"Wouldn't dream of it. I'm sure you'll feel better afterwards." Lisbon didn't see him smirk as he trailed behind her.

The firing gallery was completely deserted. The officer on duty checked them in and sat back at his desk, feet up, with the newspaper. Jane made sure to physically crowd Lisbon, surreptitiously urging her to the far cubicle.

"Get off my tail, Jane! You walk on my shoes and I'll put you on your ass."

"My, my, Lisbon. All this talk about butts and tails and asses and insertions. Are you deliberately working me up? Do you want something?"

"What? You idiot! You are seriously deluded."

"I know what you like when you're angry." He rested his hand on her bottom, splaying his fingers wide and defining its curve with his touch. "I know what makes you feel better, and I am more than eager to do my part." He brought her hand to his fly and made her feel his interest. She pulled her hand away, not without noticing his condition.

When she tried to shake his hand off rear end, it just widened the scope of his fondling and he dipped his fingers under the swell of her ass.

At least her voice was softer when she said, "If that was what I liked whenever I was angry, you'd be tearing me a new one every day."

"Tearing? No. Never tearing. You know that. That's when I'm easiest with you. Slow, gentle, insistent. Just as you like. I'm never rough with you there." He reached into his vest pocket, pulled out a condom packet and rattled it in front of her face. They only used a condom for one type of activity, and she knew immediately what he was suggesting.

"Since when have you taken to carrying condoms with you?"

"Oh." He pushed aside her hair to kiss the back of her neck so softly and sensually that it raised gooseflesh and her nipples at the same time. "I've been watching this build all week."

"If you watched your behavior and your mouth instead, there wouldn't be anything building."

"You know that's not true. And if it didn't, we wouldn't be having fun making love this way."

"We're at the firing range. We're not making love here. The officer is out there. He could come in at any time."

"I know. Isn't it exciting? And if we do it this way . . . " He used the full weight of his hand to press into the crease of her fanny, sinking a fingertip just over her now tingling anus and wiggling to tease it. "If we do it this way, it will be so much easier to hide what we're doing."

"Hide? Every inch of this room must be covered by security cameras."

He cupped his hands over her breasts and allowed the luscious feel of them to penetrate pleasure to his marrow. "You're stalling, Lisbon," he rumbled near her ear. "It's a delicious tease." He pasted himself to her back and pushed his hard dick against her several times as she began to sway with him.

"No. No cameras today. I've seen to it." Drawing a hand down to her waist, he trailed it across her hipbone to her stomach, unbuttoning her trousers and pulling the zipper down. "What have we here?"

He hooked a thumb at the waist of her panties and slid along until reaching the front, then dove underneath them, kneading and squeezing her flesh until he slid just one fingertip to her clitoris and began massaging it from side to side. Just the top. He wouldn't touch the tip. The tease aggravated her quickly and she tried to tilt her hips to make him go deeper.

"Oh, no, no, no, Agent Lisbon. We can't have that thing firing prematurely. It has to be primed properly. And cocked."

He rubbed a nice hard on all over the small of her back. She could feel it roll through their clothing. While she was distracted he had pushed into the wet now coming from her core, had already returned to how he'd been touching her, flicking the tip of her clit just once on the way back. That drew her attention! Groaning low, she moved her hips to make him do it again, but he wouldn't. Instead, he slid her pants and underwear below her rump, gasping at the sight of the fleshy cheeks, displayed for him above a rim of lowered lace. He played with her, touching and caressing, gliding his free hand along the silky softness of her skin. He bent to kiss the firm globes, sometimes mouthing her wetly, in a constant fantasy of how it would be inside her tight passage, moving until she was just as lost in their hot connection.

But right now, she was nervous, wanting him but resisting their circumstances. He opened his own clothes and laid his hard dick on the part of her bottom. He pulled the cheeks and laid his length on the deep of her, pressing himself in with his hands so that she would feel the weight and girth of his want pushing her apart.

"Jane. Jane." Lisbon couldn't think of anything else to say. The desire had taken her speech. Every part of her lower anatomy felt as if an alarm was going off, tingling and calling, but there was no answer.

Jane pulled her up a little and his mouth met her ear, kissing and nibbling, making trails all over her back where he had pulled down the collar of her blouse.

"What?" he whispered. "Tell me what you want. I'll do it." He released her and she bent forward, but she wouldn't ask him.

"Bet you can't hit a target while I fuck you back here." Maybe pinging her vanity a little would bring her around.

"You're so wrong. I'm an ace marksman."

"Markswoman, to me, he said fondling her breasts and scraping the nipples through her clothes with his fingernails. "Prove me wrong. Cue the target. You need the practice, Agent. And someone will begin to wonder why there's no shooting going on. Come on now. I want to shoot into you so bad."

She pressed a button that noisily brought the target into view downrange.

"Jane. Your finger. Put your finger in me back there. Play with me everywhere."

"Mmmmm, what a wonderful idea. I'd love that." Reaching in his pants pocket, he pulled out a small bottle of lubricant and loaded it on his finger. Careful to lift his nail away from the delicate side tissues, he slowly worked his way into her and used the flat of his finger to massage everything within its reach softly in a side-to-side motion.

She bent forward with a deep sigh and he used his other hand to stimulate her vulva and clitoris, relaxing her for the moment he would enter her. The thrill of what he was doing was almost overpowering, making him rigid as rock, leaking his own moisture.

"Pick up your gun, Lisbon."

"Wait. Do that some more. I'm going to come."

"You're dawdling."

"I'm not. Keep doing that."

He stopped and removed both hands from her, triggering a frustrated groan. "What are you doing?" Her voice took on a distinct hiss, her anger rising easily. "Fuck the gun. Fuck the target. I want you to fuck me."

"We have a wager. Now. Pick up your gun and start shooting. And I will fuck you."

He watched while Lisbon picked up her pistol, aimed and fired at the target several times. The powerful odor of burning cordite filled the stall and wafted above them. Perfume to Lisbon's nose, he was sure.

He quickly put on a condom, making sure it was snug, no wrinkles or creases to irritate Lisbon's delicate tissues inside. He pumped himself several times, enjoying the anticipation of what he was about to do and making himself as hard as possible, knowing it would make the act that much easier and more enjoyable.

Bending close to the back of her neck, he spoke to her, half breath and half moaning. "Now I'm going to concentrate back here so everything happens as it should. No awkward positions. You rub that fat clit of yours as much and as hard as you want until we make you come. That's what I want. I want you to come so hard that I feel it in back of you. Ready, Teresa?"

She was panting with anticipation and need, bowing her back, and presenting her round rump to him. "Yes, I'm ready."

Putting some more lubricant over the condom, Jane made a tight thrusting movement with his hips and the swollen head of his penis slipped right into her. "Ah! That's so good, you feel so good in there." He felt her relax and he pulled her hips slowly to seat himself completely. They grunted and gasped together. Lisbon still had her gun in her hand.

"Okay, now. Aim and shoot. I won't make any fast movements, Agent. Let's see how good you are."

"Aaahhhhhn. Just once, Jane."

"Three times. Let's see how you do."

"Twice then."

"Done."

She fired two shots in quick succession and set down her gun.

"Agent Lisbon, you're cheating. You didn't even try."

"Shut up, Jane. Just, please . . . just keep moving in me like that. You feel so good."

Lisbon's voice was a stream of wavering low sounds as she rubbed herself and softly encouraged his movements. Jane started slowly, rotating his cock as he moved in and out to coat them both with the lubricant at every surface. When he sped up, she was already meeting his thrusts, so fully relaxed that she was able to rise up enough to turn her head for a kiss. He pulled her close so that he could cover her parted lips and held her to make it easy for them both as he plunged into her soft mouth. Desire snaked his entire spine as he experienced the softness of her mouth and the softness in the depth of her body at the same time. He could feel the rings of her muscles become a craven masseuse, rippling a closed thumb and forefinger up and down his rigid cock.

Lisbon broke the kiss and fell into a rhythm of sound that was feminine in range, but made with gritted teeth and mimicking a winner's exhaustion at the end of a fight. Her breath expelled as if she was mustering the power and the oxygen to keep going. Finally her voice broke into a sobbing call as her orgasm took over, the powerful muscles of her core contracting, tightening the tissue around Jane as it pulled rhythmically from deep in her womb somewhere. It seemed to be bumping against the full length of his engorged flesh. Grabbing her shoulders as he shoved into her one last time, he came, spilling helplessly and calling like a hawk on the wing.

"Oh, Lisbon! Lisbon." He couldn't stop breathing her name, this beautiful wonderful woman who loved him and gave him so much pleasure.

Regret pierced him when he had to separate from her. He felt it keenly, as if he'd lost a part of himself. It grabbed the remorse he felt for the trouble he had caused her and tag-teamed him in his post-orgasmic trough. "I'm sorry," he said quietly. "But I wouldn't have done any differently with that case."

Lisbon fastened her clothes and turned to him. She touched his face and drew him down for a kiss. "I know. It's just hard sometimes, that's all."

He stood with his pants still open and the condom on his softening flesh. "Give me your hanky and I'll get this off of you."

Placing the white square in her open palm, Jane sighed. "There goes another perfectly good handkerchief."

"It's for a worthy cause." Lisbon smiled and wadded the condom into the hanky, lodging it in her jacket pocket to toss in the nearest unremarkable trashcan. She tucked his floppy business comfortably away, truly enjoying the soft squishy feel of him in his quiescent state, then zipped him up and patted his belly. "Are you done shooting?"

He snorted a laugh. "For now."

Almost walking away without retrieving Lisbon's target, Jane stopped short and said, "Wait! Let's see how you did on YOUR shoot!"

They watched as the large paper target rolled on the pulley towards them.

"Ah ha! And you thought I wasn't trying!"

Jane looked at the holes in the target figure and whistled. "You are an ace!"

Holding it high, Lisbon apprised the daylight flowing through the cluster of holes centered in the target's chest. "Yes, I am." She turned to Jane and gave him a quick kiss. "But I'd rather have you shooting me, anytime."


End file.
